Today I am grateful. For family and for love, for food in my belly and a good book to read. Friends near and far and an amazing partner in life who makes me laugh and keeps me company and makes me feel wanted. Cute dogs. Good tunes. A roof over my head and some money in the bank.
This morning Jon’s grandma died. She was a sweet old lady of nearly 90 glorious years, and will be dearly missed, and her passing has brought up all these feelings and thoughts that I can’t find the energy to articulate at the moment. Thoughts of generations living together, and the things that we owe one another; what it means to be elderly today and what will happen when Jon and I’s parents grow old; what will happen to my family if I live overseas as they get old (and heaven forbid, sick). What it means to be a family and how intrinsically, deeply connected we all are to one another, whether we always remember or not, whether we see each other consistently or not. Family ties, in all their glory and strife and sorrow. And it makes me think of my grandmothers, both long gone now, and how much I still wish they were here to talk to and guide me. Because I don’t know if there is a day when I won’t need their guidance. I miss them. But mostly my heart hurts for Jon’s family, and their loss of a really great lady who I never really knew at her best, and most of all for Jon’s granddad, who, after all those decades of marriage is now facing an incomprehensible loss.
Please love each other.